mindfulness

HAPPINESS TIP: GIVE EVERYTHING THE ATTENTION IT DESERVES (AND NOTHING MORE)!

Posted on by Joseph M. Brennan Jr.

You can lead a rich and rewarding life by making yourself a priority and focusing on that which truly matters and disregarding the rest. So, DO NOT spend another moment doing meaningless things whether it’s a senseless task at work or home, something you’ve been invited to that you have no interest in, or somebody else’s drama or gossip which you could care less about. A great, stress-free way to handle anything you encounter in life is to simply GIVE IT THE ATTENTION IT DESERVES (AND NOTHING MORE)!

For example, if my boss gives me a pointless task I might respond, “Yes, boss. I’ll get right on that.” But if, in my opinion, it is truly a senseless task I might spend 10 minutes on it. If someone starts saying horrible things about someone else I might nod and say, “Well, it was nice seeing you,” and then be on my way. If someone else asks me to help out with something that I have no interest in I might say something like,  “I’m sorry but I’m going to be busy then,” and free up that time for something else which might be more rewarding or inspirational in nature. Another example involves posts on social media.

It’s quite concerning that much of the posts on social media are garbage. And each and every one of us, whether the readers or writers of such posts, need to take responsibility for considering the validity of these before communicating, commenting, taking actions, or propagating these. The first thing each of us need to be asking is, are good sources being cited and has sufficient fact-checking been done supporting the claims being made or are we writing or reading “empty, baseless posts” or “emotional outbursts.” I don’t care whether the posts are about Democrats, Republicans, Trump, Biden, Sanders, the Covid-19 virus, or anything else. If no credible sources are cited and no fact-checking is done then consider the posts you are writing or reading to be gossip, garbage, drama and a complete waste of everyone’s time and energy. Simply GIVE EVERYTHING THE ATTENTION IT DESERVES (AND NOTHING MORE)!

Anyone can post anything they want, but anyone who truly wants to base and communicate their judgments, opinions, and such on facts would identify good sources and do some fact-checking when communicating their positions. The amount of misinformation on social media creates mass confusion and can cause mass extreme reactions for no reason. We owe it to ourselves (and others) to identify credible sources and perform some fact-checking when communicating and consuming posts regarding concerns and potential issues.

And keep in mind that everything is debatable. We all need to be open to different viewpoints which are also based on alternate valid fact-based sources.

These are things each and everyone of us need to be mindful of. We owe it to ourselves (and others) to ONLY communicate, consume, and react to that which appears to be fact-based. Anything else is gossip, garbage, drama, and counterproductive.

And anytime you come across writers of such posts repeatedly be sure to “GIVE THEM THE ATTENTION THEY DESERVE (AND NOTHING MORE)!” Each and every time. Anytime I identify someone who repeatedly appears to be a post-writing, “baseless, gossiping, drama queen,” I treat anything they write from that point on as fairy tales and falsehoods which are laughable at best and not truly worthy of any attention at all. In fact, I’ll probably copy the link to this post as my response to these and write a polite message such as: “Thank you for that colorful post. Here is my response to that: https://brighterdayslifecoaching.com/happiness-tip-give-everything-the-attention-it-deserves-and-nothing-more/ . I hope all’s well with you and I wish you the very best (as always).” I encourage each and every one of you to do the same.

You can lead a happy, peaceful, stress-free life by simply giving things the attention they deserve all along the way. You don’t have to be involved with everything that comes your way or goes on around you. Especially that which seems pointless, baseless, is not well thought out, or doesn’t matter much. So many people spend so much of their lives inflating small things into big things without realizing they DO NOT have to participate. Simply step back, give it some thought, and give everything (and everyone) the attention it deserves and nothing more. Each and every time. You’re welcome.

Well, there you have it. Now, you know one of my life secrets. So, if at any time, you’re wondering why I’m not rushing out to buy that latest thing you told me about which will “change my life forever” or not following the “fantastic” advice you gave on social media, well, I might just be thinking: “Yeah. Thanks for that. I’m giving it the attention it deserves.”

This and other happiness and self-improvement related tips are provided throughout my self-help oriented books and posts: https://brighterdayslifecoaching.com/published-books-and-life-coaching-services/ 

#selfimprovement #selfhelp #selfdevelopment #intention #fulfillment #success #inspiration #happiness #peace #mindfulness

HAPPINESS TIP: LIVE WITH A SENSE OF HOPE BUT DON’T RELY ON IT

Posted on by Joseph M. Brennan Jr.

Here’s a Happiness Tip which might be helpful for some of you out there. Always live with a sense of hope but don’t rely on it or use it as an excuse for inaction.


So often in life do people communicate things such as “I’m hoping for the best,” or “I hope I don’t lose my job,” or “I hope my finances will work out,” or “I hope my relationship or marriage will work out,” or “I hope I get this job or can get into this training or education program.” Anytime someone communicates these kinds of things to me, I might respond with something like: “Are you really going to rely on hope for that? Because, being hopeful is probably not going to make things happen or make things better. So, what I really want to know is what you are going to do about it.” Because even though it’s nice to live with a sense of hope, it is not helpful or empowering to rely or count on hope or use it as an excuse for not doing something. A better approach is moving from hope to action.


The following are examples of empowering ways to do this:

  • Instead of just hoping for the best, take steps to make things better.
  • Instead of hoping you won’t lose your job (for whatever reason), investigate any problem areas and come up with solutions for addressing them (in an active and iterative fashion) and take steps to make yourself so valuable to your employer that it would be foolish to let you go or allow you to get into the hands of competitors.  
  • Instead of merely hoping your finances will work out, actively investigate and adjust your spending habits, develop a budget which better ensures you pay down your debts and accumulate savings every month, and live with a sense of discipline from week-to-week and month-to-month so that your finances improve and create the financial security you desire.
  • Instead of hoping your relationship or marriage will work out, take steps to become the best boyfriend, girlfriend, husband, or wife through mindful appreciation, kindness, consideration, understanding, support, and thoughtfulness and making the other person feel special, loved, valued, and secure each and every day.

  • Instead of hoping that you get a certain job, actively research the company to determine what their values, interests, focuses, initiatives, and products and services are (as well as what is important to them), find out the latest news stories associated with the company, and be prepared to demonstrate your knowledge of the company in these regards and show how your values, skills, and experience can benefit the company to ensure you are viewed as a highly qualified and highly desired candidate for employment.

  • Instead of hoping you can get into a given training or education program, do some research and take steps to ensure you have a pretty good chance of getting into the program you desire.


Each of these are ways in which to empower yourself by taking actions instead of relying on hope to get you to where you want to be. Because, in most cases, hope alone won’t get you there. But hope combined with action might. Be sure to always remember this.  So, continue living with a sense of hope but don’t rely on it or use it as an excuse for not taking steps towards improvement, progress, or success. And although nothing is guaranteed, living in this fashion greatly improves the likelihood of improvement, progress, and success. Thus, you will realize many more “wins” and “gains” over the months, years, and decades of your life if you operate in this fashion.


This and other happiness and self-improvement related tips are provided throughout my self-help oriented books: https://brighterdayslifecoaching.com/published-books-and-life-coaching-services/

#selfimprovement #selfhelp #selfdevelopment #intention #fulfillment #success #inspiration #happiness #mindfulness #peace #love #relationships #discipline #balance #joy #optimism #positivethinking

HAPPINESS TIP – LIVING IN THE MOMENT CAN BE DETRIMENTAL AT TIMES… HERE’S WHY:

Posted on by Joseph M. Brennan Jr.

Here’s a Happiness Tip which might be helpful for some of you out there regarding present-mindedness and why it can be detrimental at times.

So often in life we are encouraged to “live in the moment,” “be present,” and “seize the day!” (i.e., “carpe diem!”) – among other, similar, popular kinds of expressions. And while living in this fashion can be helpful at times for easing worries, distress, and negativity, and creating a momentary sense of peace and enjoyment, there are also times when it can do more harm than good. Especially, during those times when we fall victim to temptations, addictions, compulsions,  distractions (TACDs), and procrastination.

Years ago I had a computer game addiction. It seemed fun and exhilarating in the micro moment-to-moment but when “zooming out” to the more macro level, I realized after playing such games all night – every night – that these kinds of activities were consuming my life to the point where they created extensive stress, fatigue, anxiety, and a lack of performance and progress in other areas of my life. Many temptation, addiction,  compulsion, distraction, and procrastination challenges do the same. Several examples come to mind:

  • spending money “seizing the day!” – every day – so there is nothing put towards the future,
  • drugs, alcohol, and other kinds of temptations and addictions,
  • anything which consumes more of life than one might like such as sports, social media, information or media content, television, social activities, money related obsessions, the internet, video games, cleaning, sex, work (in the case of workaholics), or activities (in the case of “doaholics”), and
  • anything and everything delayed or avoided due to procrastination.

Living in the moment – or a day at a time – can seem a pleasure paradise for anyone experiencing challenges such as the above because living in this fashion can lead people to believe they are living happy, successful, productive lives when – in actuality – they are not.

“How can you tell?” someone might ask. Well, one thing you can do is “zoom out” and examine your overall life from time to time. When doing this, ask yourself something like: “Am I progressing towards longer term happiness and success in my work, relationships, activities, goals, and my life overall?” If you’re not, then you might be falling victim to a “live in the moment” or “carpe diem!” mentality. Such a mentality can be a great excuse for taking detours and not moving forward in life but will never get you to where you desire to go over the longer term. Ask any addict, procrastinator, or exuberant spender.

A good way to address TACD and procrastination challenges is taking steps to moderate or eliminate anything which might be holding you back or consuming more of your life than you might like. Let’s take the computer games addiction above as an example. One way to moderate such an activity might be to limit participation such that you allow yourself to only play computer games on Wednesday and Friday nights from 8:00 pm to 11:00 pm. In my case, I elected to eliminate computer games completely. However, I could have simply limited my participation in these kinds of activities.

Some of the above TACD and procrastination challenges can be handled by simply moderating them while others – such as more severe addictions – might need to be eliminated completely. Do what works best for you or those you are providing assistance to.

Now, while it can certainly be helpful at times to “live in the present,” for easing periods of worry, distress, and negativity, and for creating a momentary sense of peace and enjoyment in life, there are also times when it can do more harm than good. So, get into the practice of “zooming out” and examining your overall life from time to time to ensure you are progressing towards the longer term happiness, harmony, and success you truly desire in life and taking steps to address any problem areas you find along the way. What a wonderful life you (and others) will create and share if you live in this fashion.

This and other happiness and self-improvement related tips are provided throughout my self-help oriented books: https://brighterdayslifecoaching.com/published-books-and-life-coaching-services/


#selfimprovement #selfhelp #selfdevelopment #intention #fulfillment #success #inspiration #happiness #mindfulness #peace #love #relationships #discipline #balance #joy #optimism #positivethinking

HAPPINESS TIP: LOVE, REVERE, AND APPRECIATE ALL THAT HAS BEEN LOANED TO YOU – FOR ALL OF YOUR DAYS – BY THE MOST GRACIOUS OF GIVERS

Posted on by Joseph M. Brennan Jr.

Here’s a Happiness Tip which summarizes my basic philosophy on life and how I choose to live on a day-to-day basis: Love, value, revere and appreciate all and everything which has been loaned to you, for all of your days, by the most gracious of givers – God, the universe, the Creator, or whatever it is you believe in.

If you live in this fashion and take special care of the universe (and all of it’s wonderful creations), it will take care of you. I have such a blessed and beautiful life. And the way I’ve been living it is probably a big reason why. So love, value, revere, and appreciate everything in your life and live with a sense of magic and wonder. If you do, you might be amazed at how wonderful and beautiful your life becomes.

This and other happiness and self-improvement related tips are provided throughout my self-help oriented books: https://brighterdayslifecoaching.com/published-books-and-life-coaching-services/ 

#selfimprovement #selfhelp #selfdevelopment #intention #fulfillment #success #inspiration #happiness

HAPPINESS TIP: ENSURE ANY IMBALANCE IN LIFE IS INTENTIONAL AND TEMPORARY

Posted on by Joseph M. Brennan Jr.

Here’s a Happiness Tip regarding making sure that any periods of imbalance experienced in life are: (1) intentional, and (2) temporary in nature.

I must say I’ve been pretty impressed by the youth of today. So many seem so determined, so driven. It reminds me a lot of some of the older and past generations. I just hope they achieve what they are seeking without burning themselves out.

I always encourage some sense of balance but communicate that temporary imbalance is okay so long as it is intentional (and not habitual) and that you: (1) know what you really, really want and are working towards this, and (2) have a clearly defined exit so that you can then get back to leading a more balanced life. Otherwise, you might fall into the trap of working your life away and wake up one day pondering what happened to your life and find yourself haunted by all you had not done or experienced in life as well as any missed opportunities. Don’t do this to yourself.

Make balance a priority in your life. Because, focus and temporary imbalance might allow you to achieve specific goals in life but living with a sense of balance will ensure that you live a rich and rewarding life overall. Balance offers variety, stamina, warmth, color, excitement, inspiration, enjoyment, satisfaction, fulfillment, and overall happiness and allows one to recognize and capitalize on the synergies and opportunities in life – many of which may not be directly related to specific goals. So, always try to keep this in mind by making sure that any periods of imbalance in your life are truly intentional (and not habitual) and temporary in nature so you can get back to living a balanced life for much of the time.

This and other happiness and self-improvement related tips are provided throughout my self-help oriented books: https://brighterdayslifecoaching.com/published-books-and-life-coaching-services/ 

#selfimprovement #selfhelp #selfdevelopment #intention #fulfillment #success #inspiration #happiness

HAPPINESS TIP: BE MINDFUL OF ALL YOU EXPOSE YOURSELF TO AND SURROUND YOURSELF WITH IN LIFE

Posted on by Joseph M. Brennan Jr.

Always be mindful of the polarity – positive or negative – associated with the resulting experiences of all you expose yourself to and surround yourself with in life. This includes that which you read, view, listen to, engage in, and those you spend your time with.

To live a happy life, you will want to mindfully incorporate more of the associated positive experiences and less of the negative ones. If you do this, you will live increasingly happier over time.

For example, someone I coached recently shared that she frequently immerses herself in content associated with various conspiracy theories. I asked her why she fills so much of her time with these kinds of activities. She indicated she enjoys them and likes to stay informed.

So, I asked her about some of the latest conspiracy theories she exposed herself to and how they made her feel. She responded that they made her feel angry, bitter, and disgusted for much of the time. Angry? Bitter? Disgusted? And for much of the time? Does this sound like a happy, enjoyable life to you?

I shared these observations with her and she began to realize how much of a toll these kinds of activities were taking on herself and her life. I encouraged her to think carefully about whether she truly wanted to expose herself to these kinds of negative experiences and, if she did, then to perhaps engage in these activities in moderation and with a sense of balance so they didn’t consume so much of her life with negativity. She started performing fewer of these activities and filling more of her time with what she truly enjoys. And she now feels much happier and more positive in nature.

So, always be mindful of what you expose yourself to in life and who you surround yourself with. Fill more of your life with positive experiences and less of your life with negative experiences. If you do this, you will live increasingly happier over time. And that will make you feel wonderful. And you will lead a rich and rewarding life. And this will benefit not only you but also everyone who surrounds you. So, do this for yourself (and others) if you can.

This and other happiness and self-improvement related tips are provided throughout my self-help oriented books: https://brighterdayslifecoaching.com/published-books-and-life-coaching-services/ 

#selfimprovement #selfhelp #selfdevelopment #intention #fulfillment #success #inspiration #happiness

HAPPINESS TIP: KEEP HEALTHY, MEANINGFUL RELATIONSHIPS AND DISCARD THE REST

Posted on by Joseph M. Brennan Jr.

Kindness, respect, and appreciation are critical aspects for relationships to be successful.  Keep in mind that any forms of hostility (verbal or otherwise) are none of these: (1) they are unkind, (2) they are disrespectful,  and (3) they lack appreciation and are actually the opposite of appreciation. So, anytime you experience these kinds of hostilities, reflect on it and have a serious  discussion about the way you will treat each other in the future. It always has to be kind, respectful, and appreciative in nature for the relationship to work. Otherwise, it is unhealthy and you might need to reconsider the relationship. This goes not only for romantic relationships but for other relationships as well such as friends, family members, co-workers, and such.

If you take the above steps, you will create healthy, loving, and meaningful relationships in your life and clear your clutter of any unhealthy relationships over time. And you will live increasingly happier and have people in your life that you value and who value you. So, do this for yourself. What a wonderful life you will create for yourself if you take these steps.

This and other happiness and self-improvement related tips are provided throughout my self-help oriented books: https://brighterdayslifecoaching.com/published-books-and-life-coaching-services/ 

#selfimprovement #selfhelp #selfdevelopment #intention #fulfillment #success #inspiration #happiness

HAPPINESS AND SUCCESS TIP: ANNOUNCE YOUR POSITIVE CHANGE GOALS PUBLICLY

Posted on by Joseph M. Brennan Jr.

If you truly desire to make a positive change in your life – whether losing weight, giving up an unhealthy habit, or any other negative aspect of your life – the best way to guarantee success is to write down your goal and announce it publicly – as publicly as possible. Especially, those in your life who you highly value and respect – those who you might feel most affected if you did notchieve your goal.

Going public in the above fashion can be frightening to people because it means they must commit to and stick to their commitments. But that is the point. They must do this or risk being judged as a failure, being fickle, or being weak – negative connotations which tend to drive people to do everything in their power to avoid. Especially, when it involves people they highly value and respect.

So, if you truly desire to make a positive change in your life – and really mean it – write it down and go public with it.

The above are ideas I wanted to highlight and reflect on from a book I’m presently reading: “Influence – The Psychology of Persuasion” by Robert Cialdini. So, I wanted to share this in case it might be helpful.

This and other happiness and self-improvement related tips are provided throughout my self-help oriented books: https://brighterdayslifecoaching.com/published-books-and-life-coaching-services/ 

#selfimprovement #selfhelp #selfdevelopment #intention #fulfillment #success #inspiration #happiness

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HAPPINESS TIP: EXAMINE AND ADJUST JUDGMENTS, ASSUMPTIONS, AND BELIEFS

Posted on by Joseph M. Brennan Jr.

I would say two of the biggest issues between people are misperceptions and misinformation. People tend to make assumptions about what something meant or hold strongly onto beliefs or make judgments based on misinformation and are often way off the mark. These judgments, assumptions, and beliefs lead people to divide against each other and more often than not for no real (and probably even a stupid) reason. Let me tell you, it’s a lot of drama for nothing! If people communicated better and were more open, the faulty judgments and assumptions being made on each side would be glaringly obvious.

So, don’t do this to yourself or anyone else. Try not to make judgments and assumptions, but if you do, try to get clarification and make adjustments accordingly. Communicate more and try to be open. If you do you will often realize that what you thought was there, was not. Warmth, love, beauty, care, and concern might have been there all along but your judgments, assumptions, and beliefs prevented you from seeing them and led you to believe otherwise.

So, do yourself and everyone else a favor: communicate more, be more open, and don’t make judgments and assumptions. What a wonderful world we could all share if we each did our part in these regards.

This and other happiness and self-improvement related tips are provided throughout my self-help oriented books: https://brighterdayslifecoaching.com/published-books-and-life-coaching-services/ 

#selfimprovement #selfhelp #selfdevelopment #intention #fulfillment #success #inspiration #happiness #relationships

HAPPINESS TIP: CREATE BRIGHTER TOMORROWS BY MAKING BETTER CHOICES TODAY

Posted on by Joseph M. Brennan Jr.

You are where you are today NOT because of your past circumstances. You are where you are today because of the choices you have made.

If you don’t like where you are today, make different choices. And keep changing things up until you start living the life you truly desire.

This is the only way to escape a past which might not have been as good as it could have been. So, take responsibility and work towards creating the future you truly want. And don’t delay. Start today.

This and other happiness and self-improvement related tips are provided throughout my self-help oriented books: https://brighterdayslifecoaching.com/published-books-and-life-coaching-services/ 

#selfimprovement #selfhelp #selfdevelopment #intention #fulfillment #success #inspiration #happiness