Here’s a happiness/success tip which can make you feel much better about yourself and your life for months, years, and decades to come. Instead of looking for ways to live with stress, anxiety, and other forms of negativity, ask yourself what thoughts and behaviors you engage in which lead to these kinds of negative experiences and make adjustments accordingly.

Most people seek help for living the way they currently do instead of seeking ideas, assistance, and support for how they might stop living in this fashion. And that is key. So, always seek healthy ways to change the thinking, behaviors, or emotions which create the negativities you experience in life instead of trying to manage or numb them.

As a life coach, I frequently tell people that anytime we experience negativity in life, we are the creator. But that is good news because if we are the creator, then we can always do something about it to make things better. So, it’s a good practice, anytime you experience stress and negativity in life, to ask yourself: “How am I creating this stress and negativity?” And then take steps to make things better.

In some cases, you might falsely conclude that someone else is creating your negativity. For example, there might be someone who doesn’t treat you very well, who only seems to come around when he or she wants something, who always takes but never gives, who never respects or appreciates you, or who talks down to you. And, even though it might seem justified and appropriate to associate your experience of negativity to this other person, a more empowering way to look at it is this: The true reason you are experiencing this negativity is because you are creating it.

“How could I possibly be creating this negativity?” you might ask. Well, in situations such as the above, you might be creating this negativity because you thought the person was different (or better) than he or she truly is, ignored the warning signs, and/or invested time, energy, and resources due to your false impressions. And when this happens, it can be natural to feel angry, disappointed, hurt, and sad. However, the true reason you are feeling this way is not because of the other person. It is because you expected this other person to be different from who he or she truly is. And it hurts when we come to the realization that we have been wrong about someone. Especially, someone we might have greatly loved, respected, and trusted.

However, once you gain the understanding that you are the one who is creating this negativity, you can move towards making things better. Because, armed with your new awareness, you can now create distance from the associated person, learn from the experience so that you become a better judge of character and become more selective of who you associate with in the future, and/or get into the practice of making only small investments in time, energy, and/or resources until you are able to better confirm whether there truly is mutual love, respect, trust, and appreciation before being willing to give more.

So, anytime you experience stress and negativity in life, get into the practice of asking yourself: “How am I creating this stress and negativity?” And then take steps to make things better.

Some of the ways to make healthier changes in life include actively engaging in self-care, making yourself a priority, setting and enforcing boundaries, and living in accordance with your values. And here’s one post I wrote for doing that: https://brighterdayslifecoaching.com/happiness-tip-make-yourself-a-priority-by-giving-everything-the-attention-it-deserves-and-nothing-more/

And here’s a another post I wrote about the many ways to actively employ self-care: https://brighterdayslifecoaching.com/how-to-defeat-any-distress-without-dope-drinks-drugs-debt-or-doctors/

And lastly, here’s a post I wrote about taking action: https://brighterdayslifecoaching.com/happiness-tip-live-with-a-sense-of-hope-but-dont-rely-on-it/

This and other happiness tips and topics are provided throughout my self-help, happiness, and investment oriented books: https://brighterdayslifecoaching.com/published-books-and-life-coaching-services/

#selfimprovement #selfhelp #selfdevelopment #intention #success #inspiration #happiness #peace #mindfulness

You can lead a rich and rewarding life by making yourself a priority and focusing on that which truly matters and disregarding the rest. So, DO NOT spend another moment doing meaningless things whether it’s a senseless task at work or home, something you’ve been invited to that you have no interest in, or somebody else’s drama or gossip which you could care less about. A great, stress-free way to handle anything you encounter in life is to simply GIVE IT THE ATTENTION IT DESERVES (AND NOTHING MORE)!

For example, if my boss gives me a pointless task I might respond, “Yes, boss. I’ll get right on that.” But if, in my opinion, it is truly a senseless task I might spend 10 minutes on it. If someone starts saying horrible things about someone else I might nod and say, “Well, it was nice seeing you,” and then be on my way. If someone else asks me to help out with something that I have no interest in I might say something like,  “I’m sorry but I’m going to be busy then,” and free up that time for something else which might be more rewarding or inspirational in nature. Another example involves posts on social media.

It’s quite concerning that much of the posts on social media are garbage. And each and every one of us, whether the readers or writers of such posts, need to take responsibility for considering the validity of these before communicating, commenting, taking actions, or propagating these. The first thing each of us need to be asking is, are good sources being cited and has sufficient fact-checking been done supporting the claims being made or are we writing or reading “empty, baseless posts” or “emotional outbursts.” I don’t care whether the posts are about Democrats, Republicans, Trump, Biden, Sanders, the Covid-19 virus, or anything else. If no credible sources are cited and no fact-checking is done then consider the posts you are writing or reading to be gossip, garbage, drama and a complete waste of everyone’s time and energy. Simply GIVE EVERYTHING THE ATTENTION IT DESERVES (AND NOTHING MORE)!

Anyone can post anything they want, but anyone who truly wants to base and communicate their judgments, opinions, and such on facts would identify good sources and do some fact-checking when communicating their positions. The amount of misinformation on social media creates mass confusion and can cause mass extreme reactions for no reason. We owe it to ourselves (and others) to identify credible sources and perform some fact-checking when communicating and consuming posts regarding concerns and potential issues.

And keep in mind that everything is debatable. We all need to be open to different viewpoints which are also based on alternate valid fact-based sources.

These are things each and everyone of us need to be mindful of. We owe it to ourselves (and others) to ONLY communicate, consume, and react to that which appears to be fact-based. Anything else is gossip, garbage, drama, and counterproductive.

And anytime you come across writers of such posts repeatedly be sure to “GIVE THEM THE ATTENTION THEY DESERVE (AND NOTHING MORE)!” Each and every time. Anytime I identify someone who repeatedly appears to be a post-writing, “baseless, gossiping, drama queen,” I treat anything they write from that point on as fairy tales and falsehoods which are laughable at best and not truly worthy of any attention at all. In fact, I’ll probably copy the link to this post as my response to these and write a polite message such as: “Thank you for that colorful post. Here is my response to that: https://brighterdayslifecoaching.com/happiness-tip-give-everything-the-attention-it-deserves-and-nothing-more/ . I hope all’s well with you and I wish you the very best (as always).” I encourage each and every one of you to do the same.

You can lead a happy, peaceful, stress-free life by simply giving things the attention they deserve all along the way. You don’t have to be involved with everything that comes your way or goes on around you. Especially that which seems pointless, baseless, is not well thought out, or doesn’t matter much. So many people spend so much of their lives inflating small things into big things without realizing they DO NOT have to participate. Simply step back, give it some thought, and give everything (and everyone) the attention it deserves and nothing more. Each and every time. You’re welcome.

Well, there you have it. Now, you know one of my life secrets. So, if at any time, you’re wondering why I’m not rushing out to buy that latest thing you told me about which will “change my life forever” or not following the “fantastic” advice you gave on social media, well, I might just be thinking: “Yeah. Thanks for that. I’m giving it the attention it deserves.”

This and other happiness and self-improvement related tips are provided throughout my self-help oriented books and posts: https://brighterdayslifecoaching.com/published-books-and-life-coaching-services/ 

#selfimprovement #selfhelp #selfdevelopment #intention #fulfillment #success #inspiration #happiness #peace #mindfulness