optimism

AN AMAZING THOUGHT GUARANTEED TO IMPROVE PERSPECTIVE: YOU ARE SPECIAL!

Posted on by Joseph M. Brennan Jr.

Love and appreciate your life. You are SPECIAL. Do you know why?

Well, everything had to happen and align PERFECTLY over hundreds of thousands of years for you to even be here:

Your parents had to meet, have a relationship that worked, and want kids. And so did each of their 2 sets of parents (4 people). And so did each of their 4 sets of parents (8 people). And so did each of their 8 sets of parents (16 people). And so on, and so on, and so on, for hundreds of thousands of years. Hundreds of thousands of years where there were many wars, deaths, violence, disease, starvation/famine, persecution, etc., etc., etc. Any one small, trivial change in all those hundreds of thousands of years and you would not be here. Any one broken link, for whatever reason, in those hundreds of billions of links and you would not be here.

So, the odds of you not being here is something on the order of one trillion to one (and just to emphasize the numerical magnitude of that – one trillion is 1,000,000,000,000). So, yes, you are special and your life is a gift – because you won the lottery of life against overwhelming odds: you are that 1 out of 1,000,000,000,000 that is here today living and breathing.

As such, there’s no reason to be stressed or otherwise negative about your life. And there’s no reason to treat others badly. Your life is a gift, and you are special because you are here – and that goes for everyone else that is here today as well. So, don’t forget it. And make it a point to always remember this.

Do something special, wonderful, and amazing with your life. And love, appreciate, and cherish your life each and every day. Because you are here. And nothing else matters. 

I wrote a similar post back in 2018 – but when I shared this with my new Spanish friends, I simplified things a bit and think this version might be better. They really seemed to like it, so I thought I’d share this version with you as well.

This and other happiness and self-improvement related tips are provided throughout my self-help oriented books: https://brighterdayslifecoaching.com/published-books-and-life-coaching-services/ and posts: https://brighterdayslifecoaching.com/category/personal-improvement-development-and-growth-related-posts/

#selfimprovement #selfhelp #selfdevelopment #intention #fulfillment #success #inspiration #happiness

HAPPINESS TIP: LIVE WITH A SENSE OF HOPE BUT DON’T RELY ON IT

Posted on by Joseph M. Brennan Jr.

Here’s a Happiness Tip which might be helpful for some of you out there. Always live with a sense of hope but don’t rely on it or use it as an excuse for inaction.


So often in life do people communicate things such as “I’m hoping for the best,” or “I hope I don’t lose my job,” or “I hope my finances will work out,” or “I hope my relationship or marriage will work out,” or “I hope I get this job or can get into this training or education program.” Anytime someone communicates these kinds of things to me, I might respond with something like: “Are you really going to rely on hope for that? Because, being hopeful is probably not going to make things happen or make things better. So, what I really want to know is what you are going to do about it.” Because even though it’s nice to live with a sense of hope, it is not helpful or empowering to rely or count on hope or use it as an excuse for not doing something. A better approach is moving from hope to action.


The following are examples of empowering ways to do this:

  • Instead of just hoping for the best, take steps to make things better.
  • Instead of hoping you won’t lose your job (for whatever reason), investigate any problem areas and come up with solutions for addressing them (in an active and iterative fashion) and take steps to make yourself so valuable to your employer that it would be foolish to let you go or allow you to get into the hands of competitors.  
  • Instead of merely hoping your finances will work out, actively investigate and adjust your spending habits, develop a budget which better ensures you pay down your debts and accumulate savings every month, and live with a sense of discipline from week-to-week and month-to-month so that your finances improve and create the financial security you desire.
  • Instead of hoping your relationship or marriage will work out, take steps to become the best boyfriend, girlfriend, husband, or wife through mindful appreciation, kindness, consideration, understanding, support, and thoughtfulness and making the other person feel special, loved, valued, and secure each and every day.

  • Instead of hoping that you get a certain job, actively research the company to determine what their values, interests, focuses, initiatives, and products and services are (as well as what is important to them), find out the latest news stories associated with the company, and be prepared to demonstrate your knowledge of the company in these regards and show how your values, skills, and experience can benefit the company to ensure you are viewed as a highly qualified and highly desired candidate for employment.

  • Instead of hoping you can get into a given training or education program, do some research and take steps to ensure you have a pretty good chance of getting into the program you desire.


Each of these are ways in which to empower yourself by taking actions instead of relying on hope to get you to where you want to be. Because, in most cases, hope alone won’t get you there. But hope combined with action might. Be sure to always remember this.  So, continue living with a sense of hope but don’t rely on it or use it as an excuse for not taking steps towards improvement, progress, or success. And although nothing is guaranteed, living in this fashion greatly improves the likelihood of improvement, progress, and success. Thus, you will realize many more “wins” and “gains” over the months, years, and decades of your life if you operate in this fashion.


This and other happiness and self-improvement related tips are provided throughout my self-help oriented books: https://brighterdayslifecoaching.com/published-books-and-life-coaching-services/

#selfimprovement #selfhelp #selfdevelopment #intention #fulfillment #success #inspiration #happiness #mindfulness #peace #love #relationships #discipline #balance #joy #optimism #positivethinking

HAPPINESS TIP – LIVING IN THE MOMENT CAN BE DETRIMENTAL AT TIMES… HERE’S WHY:

Posted on by Joseph M. Brennan Jr.

Here’s a Happiness Tip which might be helpful for some of you out there regarding present-mindedness and why it can be detrimental at times.

So often in life we are encouraged to “live in the moment,” “be present,” and “seize the day!” (i.e., “carpe diem!”) – among other, similar, popular kinds of expressions. And while living in this fashion can be helpful at times for easing worries, distress, and negativity, and creating a momentary sense of peace and enjoyment, there are also times when it can do more harm than good. Especially, during those times when we fall victim to temptations, addictions, compulsions,  distractions (TACDs), and procrastination.

Years ago I had a computer game addiction. It seemed fun and exhilarating in the micro moment-to-moment but when “zooming out” to the more macro level, I realized after playing such games all night – every night – that these kinds of activities were consuming my life to the point where they created extensive stress, fatigue, anxiety, and a lack of performance and progress in other areas of my life. Many temptation, addiction,  compulsion, distraction, and procrastination challenges do the same. Several examples come to mind:

  • spending money “seizing the day!” – every day – so there is nothing put towards the future,
  • drugs, alcohol, and other kinds of temptations and addictions,
  • anything which consumes more of life than one might like such as sports, social media, information or media content, television, social activities, money related obsessions, the internet, video games, cleaning, sex, work (in the case of workaholics), or activities (in the case of “doaholics”), and
  • anything and everything delayed or avoided due to procrastination.

Living in the moment – or a day at a time – can seem a pleasure paradise for anyone experiencing challenges such as the above because living in this fashion can lead people to believe they are living happy, successful, productive lives when – in actuality – they are not.

“How can you tell?” someone might ask. Well, one thing you can do is “zoom out” and examine your overall life from time to time. When doing this, ask yourself something like: “Am I progressing towards longer term happiness and success in my work, relationships, activities, goals, and my life overall?” If you’re not, then you might be falling victim to a “live in the moment” or “carpe diem!” mentality. Such a mentality can be a great excuse for taking detours and not moving forward in life but will never get you to where you desire to go over the longer term. Ask any addict, procrastinator, or exuberant spender.

A good way to address TACD and procrastination challenges is taking steps to moderate or eliminate anything which might be holding you back or consuming more of your life than you might like. Let’s take the computer games addiction above as an example. One way to moderate such an activity might be to limit participation such that you allow yourself to only play computer games on Wednesday and Friday nights from 8:00 pm to 11:00 pm. In my case, I elected to eliminate computer games completely. However, I could have simply limited my participation in these kinds of activities.

Some of the above TACD and procrastination challenges can be handled by simply moderating them while others – such as more severe addictions – might need to be eliminated completely. Do what works best for you or those you are providing assistance to.

Now, while it can certainly be helpful at times to “live in the present,” for easing periods of worry, distress, and negativity, and for creating a momentary sense of peace and enjoyment in life, there are also times when it can do more harm than good. So, get into the practice of “zooming out” and examining your overall life from time to time to ensure you are progressing towards the longer term happiness, harmony, and success you truly desire in life and taking steps to address any problem areas you find along the way. What a wonderful life you (and others) will create and share if you live in this fashion.

This and other happiness and self-improvement related tips are provided throughout my self-help oriented books: https://brighterdayslifecoaching.com/published-books-and-life-coaching-services/


#selfimprovement #selfhelp #selfdevelopment #intention #fulfillment #success #inspiration #happiness #mindfulness #peace #love #relationships #discipline #balance #joy #optimism #positivethinking

HAPPINESS TIP: BE MINDFUL OF ALL YOU EXPOSE YOURSELF TO AND SURROUND YOURSELF WITH IN LIFE

Posted on by Joseph M. Brennan Jr.

Always be mindful of the polarity – positive or negative – associated with the resulting experiences of all you expose yourself to and surround yourself with in life. This includes that which you read, view, listen to, engage in, and those you spend your time with.

To live a happy life, you will want to mindfully incorporate more of the associated positive experiences and less of the negative ones. If you do this, you will live increasingly happier over time.

For example, someone I coached recently shared that she frequently immerses herself in content associated with various conspiracy theories. I asked her why she fills so much of her time with these kinds of activities. She indicated she enjoys them and likes to stay informed.

So, I asked her about some of the latest conspiracy theories she exposed herself to and how they made her feel. She responded that they made her feel angry, bitter, and disgusted for much of the time. Angry? Bitter? Disgusted? And for much of the time? Does this sound like a happy, enjoyable life to you?

I shared these observations with her and she began to realize how much of a toll these kinds of activities were taking on herself and her life. I encouraged her to think carefully about whether she truly wanted to expose herself to these kinds of negative experiences and, if she did, then to perhaps engage in these activities in moderation and with a sense of balance so they didn’t consume so much of her life with negativity. She started performing fewer of these activities and filling more of her time with what she truly enjoys. And she now feels much happier and more positive in nature.

So, always be mindful of what you expose yourself to in life and who you surround yourself with. Fill more of your life with positive experiences and less of your life with negative experiences. If you do this, you will live increasingly happier over time. And that will make you feel wonderful. And you will lead a rich and rewarding life. And this will benefit not only you but also everyone who surrounds you. So, do this for yourself (and others) if you can.

This and other happiness and self-improvement related tips are provided throughout my self-help oriented books: https://brighterdayslifecoaching.com/published-books-and-life-coaching-services/ 

#selfimprovement #selfhelp #selfdevelopment #intention #fulfillment #success #inspiration #happiness

HAPPINESS TIP: LOVE, MARVEL, AND LET GO

Posted on by Joseph M. Brennan Jr.

Well, just what exactly are you looking for? Magic and mystery and music and magnificence dance and abound all around you every moment of every day. The sunshine smiles, the skies wander, nature sings, animals love, and the earth spins in rhythm with the heavens in perfect balance and harmony.

What more than this is needed to make one smile, sing, and dance with joy and boundless love, wonder, amazement, and appreciation? What more I ask? What more could you be looking for?

Life and living is here right here and right now. Simply love and marvel and let go and waltz with the never-ending warmth, beauty, and flow.

This and other happiness and self-improvement related tips are provided throughout my self-help oriented books: https://brighterdayslifecoaching.com/published-books-and-life-coaching-services/ 

#selfimprovement #selfhelp #selfdevelopment #intention #fulfillment #success #inspiration #happiness

HAPPINESS TIP: ON THOSE NOT SO POSITIVE DAYS, FOCUS ON HOW YOU MOST WANT TO FEEL AND THEN OFFER THAT TO OTHERS

Posted on by Joseph M. Brennan Jr.

Here’s a happiness tip on getting yourself into a positive place on those not so positive days:

There might be times in life when you are not feeling your best. A good thing to do, when this happens, is closing your eyes and – instead of focusing on how unhappy you presently feel – asking yourself how you might most want to feel and focusing on that. Many people, in these situations, do the opposite by focusing on the very negative thoughts and feelings they are seeking to moderate and overcome. It can be extremely difficult to move in a positive direction with so much attention focused on the negative. So, instead focus on how you most want to feel and take actions to gently move in this direction.

For example, if you feel lonely then you might most desire to experience feelings of love and appreciation. So, instead of focusing on your loneliness, focus on love and appreciation and steps you might take to gently move in this direction. A wonderful way to do this is offering what you most want to others. So, if you most want to escape your loneliness, then make someone else feel less lonely. And if you most want to experience love and appreciation, then offer love and appreciation to others. You will be amazed at how much love and appreciation comes back to you when you do this. Anytime we graciously and selflessly give to others that which we want for ourselves, it comes back to us in overwhelming abundance. So, do this often in your life.

And keep in mind that you can perform this process not only with people but with pets as well. So, don’t forget about your furry friends when doing this.

This and other happiness and self-improvement related tips are provided throughout my self-help oriented books: https://brighterdayslifecoaching.com/published-books-and-life-coaching-services/ 

#selfimprovement #selfhelp #selfdevelopment #intention #fulfillment #success #inspiration #happiness #relationships

HAPPINESS TIP: LIVE WITHOUT REGRETS OF WHAT MIGHT HAVE BEEN

Posted on by Joseph M. Brennan Jr.

One way to live happier is taking steps to better ensure you live without regrets. This essentially involves taking chances: taking chances on people, taking chances on opportunities, and taking chances on life experiences.

For example, back in my early 30s, to overcome my shy nature with respect to initiating conversations with others I did not know, I created and adopted the expression: “I’d rather try than be haunted by…” because the potential discomfort of trying and getting shunned was less painful than the haunting, restless thoughts of what might have been.

And I’ve had a lot of fun and gained a number of friends and wonderful life experiences over the years because of this. Many of which involve friendships which have lasted 15+ years!

A simple way to express this idea is (which my more intellectual followers might appreciate): “If A would like B to be a part of A’s life experience, then it probably makes sense for A to do something to initiate the process or communicate some sort of interest. Otherwise it may not happen.”

So, do not miss out on these kinds of wonderful life opportunities! The people and experiences in your life can add such color, beauty, excitement, and comfort throughout the months, years, and decades of your life. I STRONGLY encourage you to do this for yourself from time to time. Because you never know what might happen. So, do this for yourself if your can!

This and other happiness and self-improvement related tips are provided throughout my self-help oriented books: https://brighterdayslifecoaching.com/published-books-and-life-coaching-services/ 

#selfimprovement #selfhelp #selfdevelopment #intention #fulfillment #success #inspiration #happiness #relationships

HAPPINESS TIP: ALWAYS APPRECIATE HOW BEAUTIFUL AND WONDERFUL YOU ARE

Posted on by Joseph M. Brennan Jr.

Always know and appreciate how beautiful and wonderful you are. Sometimes in life you might come across those who do not appear to love, respect, and appreciate you but whenever that happens you must love, respect, and appreciate yourself enough to invest your time and energy towards others who do.

Keep your eyes and your heart open, for those who may not have loved, respected, and appreciated you in the past, may heal over time, and then passionately and resolutely return to you once they again realize what a beautiful, wonderful soul you are. Until that happens invest your time and energy towards those who already know that.

This and other happiness and self-improvement related tips are provided throughout my self-help oriented books: https://brighterdayslifecoaching.com/published-books-and-life-coaching-services/ 

#selfimprovement #selfhelp #selfdevelopment #intention #fulfillment #success #inspiration #happiness

An Amazing Thought Guaranteed to Improve Perspective

Posted on by Joseph M. Brennan Jr.

Love and appreciate your life. You are SPECIAL. Think about everything that had to happen PERFECTLY just so that you could be here today living and breathing. Each and every person in your genetic chain meeting, loving, surviving, and conceiving each and every person in that chain for thousands of years! Any ONE trivial change in those thousands of years and you would not be here today. Think about that and how wonderful it is to be experiencing the life you are experiencing now! If that doesn’t fill you with wonder and amazement and appreciation, then you really need a perspective boost! And if you need help with that you know who to ask!

This and other happiness and self-improvement related tips are provided throughout my self-help oriented books: https://brighterdayslifecoaching.com/published-books-and-life-coaching-services/ 

#selfimprovement #selfhelp #selfdevelopment #intention #fulfillment #success #inspiration #happiness

Be the Most Gracious of Guests While Here on This Planet

Posted on by Joseph M. Brennan Jr.
People frequently ask me questions like why I am so happy, why I’m vegan, and why I pick up recyclables when they see me walking or running. Well, much of it has to do with the way I look at life and my philosophy on life as a whole. The following story I wrote a few years ago presents much of how I see things and why I do what I do and feel the way I feel. The edited version of this story was presented in my first self-help book, LIVING BLISS to more gently introduce this philosophy. The complete, unedited version is provided in my second self-help book, LOVING YOUR LIFE, for readers interested in achieving a fuller, deeper, and more complete understanding. I encourage you to read the below story, reflect upon it, and ask yourself what positive changes you might like to make in your life as a result.
 

This and other happiness and self-improvement related tips are provided throughout my self-help oriented books: https://brighterdayslifecoaching.com/published-books-and-life-coaching-services/ 

#selfimprovement #selfhelp #selfdevelopment #intention #fulfillment #success #inspiration #happiness

 
 
THE UNWELCOME GUEST
 
Imagine that you loaned the use of your home to a house guest for a few days while you were away. Several weeks later he’s still in your home and has pretty much taken over your entire place. He invites loud, boisterous friends over to play cards and to drink beer and you find yourself spending more and more time away from your home, because you feel threatened by him and his friends who act hostile towards you for not being the way that they are. Even on quieter nights, when only you and he are at home, and you want to sit in the living room to watch television he’s always there ~ sprawled out on the couch watching something that you have no interest in.
 
You go to the refrigerator to get a glass of water from your fresh jug of spring water, but the container is empty. While you are there you decide you’re hungry and think you might enjoy some of that delicious vegetable casserole you prepared the day before, but find that the container has been half eaten and carelessly tossed onto one of the counter tops. Your home ~ which used to be tidy and neat ~ now has dirty clothes and trash strewn all about and dirty counters and dishes everywhere. The floors and carpets are saturated with dirt, mud, beer, and food. All of this mess, because your guest does not clean up after himself. Sometimes, he doesn’t even flush the toilet after using the bathroom and he leaves soiled pots and pans on the counters and in the sink. All in all, your home has become a dirty, stinking, filthy mess. How does this make you feel towards your house guest?
 
Now consider another kind of house guest. Imagine that you loaned the use of your home to a different person for a few days while you were away. When you return you find your home has been thoroughly cleaned, polished, and beautified to the extent that it is in far better condition than when you first left. In addition, you receive a card and gift thanking you for the use of your home. You find yourself looking forward to going home and wanting to spend more time in your home, because of how much more wonderful it has become. How wonderful would you feel and how likely would you be to help and do nice things for this person in the future? Most likely, you would want to become more a part of the person’s life, desire to do more to contribute to his or her life, and make the individual feel warmly welcome to come back and visit in the future.
 
Well, the spiritual world operates in very much the same fashion whether your belief system involves God, the universe, or some other higher power or spiritual representation. The more you express genuine appreciation the more love, peace, and happiness you will experience and have to be appreciative of ~ the spiritual world continually rewarding your appreciation with more to be appreciative of and showering with love, peace, and happiness the lives of those “house guests” here on this planet who are kind, mindful, considerate, and appreciative of the hospitality extended to them by the most gracious of givers. Those who generously offer kind and mindful contributions to the world for the benefit of all of our creator’s creations ~ making the earth a better and more pleasant place for all who share our planet.
 
Fortunately, for us ~ with respect to the unwelcome guest scenario presented towards the beginning of this section above ~ we can resolve situations such as this long before they get too out of hand and without too much effort. We have a police force that can serve and protect us, negotiate threatening situations, and keep offenders from returning. If only nature and less fortunate persons had others looking out for them in similar ways. Such hardship is unnecessarily created just so people can live more comfortably and conveniently. However, many of us are not mindful of this and do not carry this awareness.
 
Through kindness, lovingness, and mindfulness we can create a wonderful, new world:
 
~ A world in which we realize we are all a part of that life which lives and breathes and deserves to be free from fear, pain, suffering, and death.
 
~ A world in which we LOVE-AND-CHERISH-AND-OPEN-OUR-HEARTS towards other living and breathing beings as we do towards ourselves.
 
We can become more mindful. We can become more respectful. We can become more considerate and make kinder choices. We can love, and appreciate, and cherish all of life and generously share our world with other living and breathing beings. We can purge our homes of that unwelcome guest and assist all of our fellow, innocent, living and breathing beings in doing the same by becoming the most gracious, the most reverent, and the most considerate of guests in loving appreciation for the wonderful lives and the hospitality we have all been graciously granted. We can achieve this by living more mindfully and by making kind and mindful contributions.
 
The earth has historically been a holocaust of animal farming and production, animal exploitation, and animal science and testing ~ hardships unnecessarily created for nature just so people can: live more comfortably and conveniently, build and expand, reap profits and rewards, advertise products and services, and be entertained. Other living and breathing beings are continuously exploited and forced to suffer their entire lives to support the interests of the advertisement and entertainment industries, the research community, and the food, clothing, and dairy production industries. However, we can create a better world today for all who share our planet. We are all a part of that life which lives and breathes and we can love and care for other living and breathing beings as we do for ourselves.
 
 
So, the above story summarizes my philosophy on life. I believe life is such a wonderful gift and we are all guests here on this planet. Guests of God’s (or our higher power’s) hospitality. This is one reason why I am ever so thankful and grateful for the life I have and the life I get to share with other living and breathing beings who share our planet. Thus, I make an effort each and every day to express my appreciation and gratitude. One of the primary ways I do this is by living more mindfully and by making kind and mindful contributions. Whenever we live our lives in this fashion we create peace and happiness within our own lives, within the lives of others, and within the world which surrounds us.
 
In my own life I choose to live mindfully in a variety of ways to include: minimizing waste, living in moderation, relishing all of life (humans and nonhumans alike), and making a positive imprint to make the world of today and the world of tomorrow a better place. I see one of my primary purposes in life as one of offering and promoting happiness, appreciation, and well-being for the benefit of all living and breathing beings including:
 
~ loving, respecting, appreciating, and living in harmony with the earth and all who share her,
 
~ extending love, warmth, and kindness to others, and
 
~ living kindly and mindfully so as not to cause pain, suffering, or harm.
 
Everything that surrounds us has been loaned to us by the most gracious of givers: God, the universe, and/or our higher power. As such, there is nothing in this world that we truly own. Even our lives have been loaned to us. So let’s make the most of our lives and strive to become the most gracious, the most reverent, and the most considerate of guests while living here on this planet.
 
I have the strongest desire to be that gracious, kind, and mindful guest. As such, each and every day I strive to live ever more mindfully and to contribute to the world which surrounds me. I encourage you to do the same. What a wonderful world we could all share if each and every one of us contributed in these regards.