One thing I frequently tell people for improving the future and living a happier life involves working towards solving actual, instead of perceived, problems. People I coach often seek to make positive changes in their lives and have specific perceived “issues” they want to initially focus on. But, the first question I generally ponder is whether the proposed change will offer the most optimal change for the person overall. The change that will create the greatest happiness, inspiration, fulfillment, and/or success for the individual.

Often, people feel they have specific issues which must be resolved before they will ever be able to live happier. However, the first question I frequently ask in such situations is: “Why do you think this is such a significant issue, how does this create unhappiness, discontent, and negativity in your life, and in what ways does it hinder you?” If the problem is truly significant, the person should be able to articulate concrete responses to this. Otherwise, it is likely to be more of a perceived problem than an actual one.

Another thing I like to do in this regard is ask the person what he or she thinks life would be like if the problem did not exist or how things might be different and allow this vision to guide his or her actions towards improvement. The point of these kinds of inquiries is determining whether the perceived problem is an actual (and significant) one before putting forth the time and energy towards resolving it.

You might be surprised at how much time and energy people put towards solving problems that were never true problems to begin with. They were merely perceived issues they told themselves they had even though these did not concretely create unhappiness, discontent, or negativity in their lives other than in the thoughts surrounding their perceived need to resolve them.

Sometimes, the perceived problems we have are not problems at all other than our acceptance that these are part of who we are. And if there is little or no evidence of these concretely creating unhappiness, discontent, and negativity in our lives, then we would benefit from seeking a more optimal positive change for ourselves so we can better realize greater happiness, inspiration, fulfillment, and success in life.

The point of all this is making sure you perform a thorough investigation before attempting to solve problems which may not truly be problems at all. You will save yourself a lot of time, energy, stress, unhappiness, and frustration if you do.

This and other happiness and self-improvement related tips are provided throughout my self-help oriented books: https://brighterdayslifecoaching.com/published-books-and-life-coaching-services/ 

#selfimprovement #selfhelp #selfdevelopment #intention #fulfillment #success #inspiration #happiness