Happiness and Self-Help Related Posts

How to live a happy, peaceful, and fulfilling life. How to create a sense of joy, inspiration, enjoyment, wonder, excitement, peace, and passion in life.

Live Your Own Life and Your Life Only

Posted on by Joseph M. Brennan Jr.

HAPPINESS TIP: Live your own life, and your life only, no matter what others think, believe, express, or attempt to convince you otherwise. Many people who experience unhappiness in their lives do so, because  they are living other people’s lives and not their own. And often they are not even aware they are doing this.

This is your life and your journey. Treat it as such by finding out who you are and what you want and live that way by being true to yourself such that you live an authentic life. You will be amazed at how wonderful you will feel when you live this way.

And if you are not to the point in your life where you know who you are and what you truly want, then simply explore and live with a sense of adventure until you do. I frequently tell people that exploration and adventure is the spice of life. So continue doing these kinds of things as well.

You will be amazed at how much happier, upbeat, and positive you will feel when you start living your own life. So do this for yourself if you can.

This and other happiness and self-improvement related tips are provided throughout my self-help oriented books: https://brighterdayslifecoaching.com/published-books-and-life-coaching-services/ 

#selfimprovement #selfhelp #selfdevelopment #intention #fulfillment #success #inspiration #happiness

HAPPINESS TIP: Focus On What You Have Instead of What You’ve Lost

Posted on by Joseph M. Brennan Jr.

HAPPINESS TIP: Focus on what you have instead of what you have lost. Especially if you’re going through a period of stress, anxiety, depression, sadness, or other forms of unhappiness and negativity. This goes for the people in your life, the relationships you have, your finances, and your possessions.

For those select times when you decide you truly want to focus on a loss (such as a period following a break-up), allow it, but do it in a mindful fashion instead of in an automated, reactive fashion the way people often do. Mindfully decide to do it and mindfully decide for how long. Then get back to enjoying your life and focusing on what you have in your life.

You will be amazed at how much happier, upbeat, and positive you will feel when you do this. So do this for yourself if you can.

This and other happiness and self-improvement related tips are provided throughout my self-help oriented books: https://brighterdayslifecoaching.com/published-books-and-life-coaching-services/ 

#selfimprovement #selfhelp #selfdevelopment #intention #fulfillment #success #inspiration #happiness

HAPPINESS TIP: Focus on How You Most Want to Feel and Then Offer That to Others

Posted on by Joseph M. Brennan Jr.
HAPPINESS TIP: Here’s a quick happiness tip for those who might be experiencing a period of stress, negativity, or unhappiness: Instead of focusing on how horrible you feel, focus on how you most want to feel and then offer that to others. So, for example, if you feel lonely or unappreciated and most want more love and appreciation in your life, then give more love and appreciation. You will be amazed at how much love and appreciation comes back to you when you do this. Anytime you graciously and selflessly offer to others that which you want for yourself, it will come back to you in overwhelming abundance.
 

This and other happiness and self-improvement related tips are provided throughout my self-help oriented books: https://brighterdayslifecoaching.com/published-books-and-life-coaching-services/ 

#selfimprovement #selfhelp #selfdevelopment #intention #fulfillment #success #inspiration #happiness #relationships

 

Practice and Value Open-Mindedness, Kindness, and Compassion

Posted on by Joseph M. Brennan Jr.

Those who know me pretty well know that some of the things I value are patience, openness, kindness, acceptance, and compassion. Perhaps the only things I am strongly against are strong opinions and beliefs.

It’s a sad, sad fact that many people would rather ruin relationships with others and hold on rigidly to their present beliefs and opinions than entertain or even tolerate alternate viewpoints.

And the other sad fact is the beliefs and opinions people hold so dearly today often change over time which means that they might have carelessly thrown away potentially valuable relationships for nothing. Don’t do this to yourself or anyone else. Never underestimate the value of patience, openness, kindness, acceptance, and compassion. Even when we presently disagree with others on certain topics that does not mean we cannot say to those others: “Right now I disagree with you, but I respect your present opinion or belief and love and care about and wish you well” with the understanding that over time, if we are open-minded enough, opinions and beliefs can change.

So many treat every topic or issue as an “all or nothing” kind of thing, but most things in life are not that way. There can be an element of “truth” and “possibility” and “rightness” and “understanding” on every side of a topic or issue. What a wonderful world we could all share if we each understood this and practiced open-mindedness, kindness, and compassion on a regular basis.

Well, a book I recently read, Mark Manson’s “The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck” highlights some good reasons to embrace values such as patience, openness, kindness, acceptance, and compassion:

Always being right is a horrible value to have because:

“We consistently make poor assumptions, …, misremember facts, give in to cognitive biases, and make decisions based on emotional whims. As humans, we’re wrong pretty much constantly … People who base their self-worth on being right about everything prevent themselves from learning from their mistakes and … close themselves off to new and important information.”

“Most of our beliefs are wrong. Or, to be more exact, all beliefs are wrong—some are just less wrong than others. The human mind is a jumble of inaccuracy. “

There is no way to love, kindness, peace, and happiness. Love, kindness, peace, and happiness is the way. So embrace and be that today, tomorrow, and every day that follows.

This and other happiness and self-improvement related tips are provided throughout my self-help oriented books: https://brighterdayslifecoaching.com/published-books-and-life-coaching-services/ 

#selfimprovement #selfhelp #selfdevelopment #intention #fulfillment #success #inspiration #happiness #relationships

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A Quick and Easy Way to Evaluate Your Romantic Relationship

Posted on by Joseph M. Brennan Jr.

 

Here’s a quick and easy way to evaluate your present romantic relationship:

Consider the romantic relationships of others you have known throughout your entire life. They can be those that were in the marriage stage, the boyfriend/girlfriend stage, or the dating stage. Select the one you consider to be the best or most positive relationship out of all of these. Assign a value of 10 to this.

Next consider the most positive periods of relationships you’ve had in the past. Again these can be relationships that were in the marriage stage, the boyfriend/girlfriend stage, or the dating stage. You do not want to consider the entire relationships (since they are now over), but the most positive periods of each. Following this, select what you consider to be the most positive period out of all of these past relationships. On a scale of 1-10, assign a score to the most positive period you selected with the understanding that a score of 10 represents the most positive relationship, throughout your entire life, of someone you’ve known (as performed in the previous paragraph). For illustration purposes, let’s assume that you assign a value of 7 to this.

Lastly, consider how your present relationship compares to the most positive period of the relationship above (i.e., how much better or worse is your present relationship with respect to the one you might have assigned a “7” to in the previous paragraph). If your present relationship is better than the most positive period of one of your past relationships then you would assign a value between 7 and 10 depending on how your present relationship relates to the conditions in the previous paragraphs above associated with the scores of 7 and 10.  If your present relationship is not as good as the most positive period of one of your past relationships then you would assign a value below 7 depending on how much worse the present relationship relates to the condition in the previous paragraph above associated with the score of 7.

Assessing your romantic relationships in the above fashion can be helpful because: 1) if it scores highly on the 1-10 scale it can allow you to become more appreciative towards your present relationship and motivate you to express that appreciation more often and in multiple ways, 2) if it scores moderately on the 1-10 scale it can cause you to reflect on the more positive relationships (or the more positive periods in your past relationships) and motivate you to take  steps to improve your present relationship, and 3) if it scores poorly on the 1-10 scale it can allow you to take steps to remove yourself from the relationship so that you can be available to find one that is more positive.

The above process can also be helpful to perform when faced with major life decisions with respect to romantic relationships. For example, if you are faced with the prospect of marriage or perhaps moving to another city so you can be with your romantic partner, then this can help you to quickly determine whether or not it might be something worthwhile to seriously consider.

Each of these are wonderful ways in which performing this assessment can be helpful. So make sure that you do this from time to time in your life.

This and other happiness and self-improvement related tips are provided throughout my self-help oriented books: https://brighterdayslifecoaching.com/published-books-and-life-coaching-services/ 

#selfimprovement #selfhelp #selfdevelopment #intention #fulfillment #success #inspiration #happiness #relationships

Create Excitement Through Synergy and Opportunity

Posted on by Joseph M. Brennan Jr.

I frequently tell people there is synergy and opportunity in most everything in life. Even things you might not be very excited or motivated about. You just need the ability to recognize, create, and capitalize on it. The first step to this “recognize, create, and capitalize” process is awareness. What motivates or excites you? What do you truly value or enjoy in life? What knowledge, training, experiences, or skills might interest you or get you closer to where you long to be in life? These are some of the questions you might ask yourself when performing such an inquiry. Listen for and be open to the possibilities. Then make a list of what comes to you and listen for more possibilities. Then revise the list and listen for more  possibilities. And once you think your list is final listen once more for the possibilities and revise the list again. Then prioritize your list by placing that which you are most excited about or long for most towards the top. Eventually you will get to the point where you will no longer need a list – you will simply know these things without even having to think about them. But you can repeat this process anytime you want to open yourself up to new possibilities.


Once you gain this awareness it will be easier for you to recognize, create, and capitalize on synergies and opportunities by aligning those activities you already perform with that which you truly want for yourself. For example, someone might complain about feeling bored at work or at home. But anytime you experience periods others might describe as boring or unproductive in nature, you will recognize these as opportunities to work towards something on your  “Happiness, Interests, and Excitements” list. You can simply go down the list from the highest  priority item at the top and work your way down until you identify something which might be feasible to work towards depending on where you are and what you are doing at the time. Eventually, those periods  of boredom and unproductivity will disappear completely because you will simply think to yourself, “Oh good! Right now I have time to work towards…” (insert item from your  “Happiness, Interests, and Excitements” list). And you can make steady progress whether it’s learning a foreign language, trying out new skills or experiences, investigating potential travel destinations, learning about finance and investing, researching a new business or career, or exploring new ideas.

As another example, someone might be unhappy about all of the hours they have to work. But whenever you work extra hours you might recognize this as an opportunity to accumulate additional resources to put towards something on your  “Happiness, Interests, and Excitements” list. This additional money might come from: 1) the income earned for the extra hours worked, 2) the savings generated by not having time to spend the money earned,  or 3) a combination of these. Once the busy period expires you might be able to purchase one or more of the desired items or experiences on your list. Eventually, those periods of unhappiness will vanish completely because you will simply think to yourself, “Oh good! Working these extra hours will allow me to purchase…” (insert item from your  “Happiness, Interests, and Excitements” list).

So the above are two examples of how these ideas might be applied by taking the former “negative” perception and transforming that into something that you truly want for yourself, something you can feel good and motivated about, and something you can look forward to. Anytime you are able to transform the “negative” into something more positive you will feel happier and better about yourself and your life. So always make a concerted effort to recognize, create, and capitalize on synergies and opportunities by aligning the activities you perform with that which you truly want for yourself.

Recently, a woman I talked with was dreading the thought of having to drive to Missouri to attend an event in a rural area. After talking with her a bit more I learned that something she was excited and motivated about in life was travel. So, I suggested that perhaps she should consider the event as an opportunity to explore a few places along the way and back. She could perhaps leave a few days early and explore cities such as Memphis and spend a few days on the way back exploring other cities such as St. Louis or other places she might have interest in. She had  been so focused on the “dreaded” event that she failed to recognize the potential opportunities presented. It’s easy to lose sight of such synergies and opportunities when you heavily focus on the source of displeasure, negativity, or discontent. Many things in life are that way. So always try to broaden your perspective and transform the negative into something more positive.

Opportunities and synergies present themselves each and every day.  You just need the ability to recognize, create, and capitalize on them. So gain and maintain awareness of that which excites, motivates, and interests you and brings you happiness. And incorporate these aspects into your day to day activities as the opportunities arise. If you do this you will feel motivated and inspired and experience great happiness, fulfillment, and contentment for much of the time. So do this for yourself if you can.

This and other happiness and self-improvement related tips are provided throughout my self-help oriented books: https://brighterdayslifecoaching.com/published-books-and-life-coaching-services/ 

#selfimprovement #selfhelp #selfdevelopment #intention #fulfillment #success #inspiration #happiness

Live and Let Go

Posted on by Joseph M. Brennan Jr.

Every day is a wonderful gracious gift to us all. Always try to remember that from hour to hour and day to day. And live your life that way.

 

Most of the negativity and difficulties we experience in life don’t matter much. We’re simply fortunate to be here breathing the same air, enjoying the same sunshine, and experiencing everything in life that we get to experience. For there are many reasons why we might not be here today:

 

– All of the close calls pushing us to the brink of nuclear annihilation, for one, over the past 70 years or so.

 

– Parents not meeting, for another, and the chain of parents all through the ages (think about that for a long, hard moment).

 

– Uncontrollable disease for yet another, etc, etc.

 

So I encourage you to reflect on these kinds of things and to live your life as if a precious gift has been handed you. Because it has including everything it contains such as those who surround you, the place where you live, all you possess, and all you experience. All of this has been given to you by the most gracious of givers. Never forget it.

 

This is your life. Live it, appreciate all you have and get to experience, and let go of negativity. Because it truly does not matter.

 

This is your life. Live it.

 

This and other happiness and self-improvement related tips are provided throughout my self-help oriented books: https://brighterdayslifecoaching.com/published-books-and-life-coaching-services/ 

 

#selfimprovement #selfhelp #selfdevelopment #intention #fulfillment #success #inspiration #happiness

HAPPINESS TIP: BE WHO YOU ARE NOT MATTER WHAT!

Posted on by Joseph M. Brennan Jr.
Here’s a simple tip for experiencing true happiness throughout the days, weeks, years, and decades of your life: 1) Discover who you are (or keep exploring until you do), 2) Embrace and be okay with who you are, and 3) Be who you are in all of its color and glory (no matter what others think, believe, express, or attempt to convince otherwise!).
 
If you do this, you will live an authentic life filled with all of the happiness, peace, freedom, and excitement you could possibly hope for. It is YOUR life experience (and nobody else’s)! Live it that way!
 
A few years ago, a woman I met seemed a bit embarrassed about being “a geek”. Well, I told her to embrace that quality, hold her head high, and be a geek with a capital G! There’s absolutely nothing wrong with discovering who you are and being who you are. So, always remember that!
 
Another aspect of being who you are is the positive effect if can have on others. For example, people frequently tell me that I have a calming effect on them when they are in my presence. Many times, because of this people like being around me even if all we do is sit and enjoy the silence. It’s so wonderful being appreciated that way. But I wouldn’t be able to create this positive effect if I wasn’t true to myself and didn’t lead an authentic life.

Now, what some people may not understand about me is that I do a lot of things on my own and enjoy it. Although, many times I’m alone, I’m not lonely, and I’m actually happy. So, while I greatly appreciate the polite gestures I sometimes receive I’m really just being me and I’m happy being me.

For example, recently I went to the movies and was the only person there. Many people would have freaked out a little about that, but I was like, “Wow! How nice! I have the entire movie theater to myself!”.

So, find out who you are, be okay with who you are, and be who you are no matter what others think, believe, express, or attempt to convince otherwise. If you do, you will feel happy and at peace for much of the time. And you will have this peace and happiness to offer to others. So do this for yourself if you can.

This and other happiness and self-improvement related tips are provided throughout my self-help oriented books: https://brighterdayslifecoaching.com/published-books-and-life-coaching-services/ 

#selfimprovement #selfhelp #selfdevelopment #intention #fulfillment #success #inspiration #happiness #relationships

The Huge Hidden Cost of Everything (and How to Avoid It)

Posted on by Joseph M. Brennan Jr.

Opportunity cost is perhaps the largest cost people experience in their lives. And most people are not even aware they have it or how much they pay out in terms of time, money, effort, happiness, and peace. Days become weeks, weeks become months, months become years, and years become decades as opportunity cost accumulates in the background. How much do you suppose you’ve paid and wasted in opportunity cost over time?

Well, anytime you engage in, participate in, or commit to something you have incurred the opportunity cost of being unavailable for something else which might have been more positive, rewarding, or inspirational in nature. This goes for the people in your life, the activities you engage in, the work you perform, the beliefs you hold onto, what you spend money on, the temptations and addictions you fall victim to, your personal relationships, the goals and dreams you pursue, your mental state of mind, and the attitude or disposition that you generally carry.

For example, people sometimes remain in relationships which are less than ideal for them (or worse) and do not realize how wonderful their lives could otherwise be. Or they work a job which is less inspiring or fulfilling than it could be. Or they believe in something others tell them to even when it creates negativity in their lives or conflicts with their values (and incidentally forgetting something that I always tell people regarding beliefs: “just because you believe it – it does not mean it’s true.”). Or they put in a lot of time, money, and effort towards achieving a goal they told themselves they wanted for years only to discover it’s not what they truly wanted at all. Or they chase after stocks that everybody loves instead of buying the hated ones which offer more promising future gains. Or they live in a constant state of stress, depression, anxiety, and/or negativity instead of taking steps to improve their mental and physical well-being and overall sense of hope, optimism, positivity, and productivity. Or they carry huge grudges, judgments, and resentments against others and never get the chance to create or experience the closeness that they truly desire with these others.

Don’t do this to yourself. There is opportunity cost with everything. So choose wisely. Move towards the more positive, rewarding, and inspirational aspects and distance yourself from the rest. If you do this you will begin to minimize or avoid the opportunity costs in your life and live increasingly happier throughout the remaining days, weeks, months, years, and decades of your life. So do not waste another precious moment. Start living your new life today.

This and other happiness and self-improvement related tips are provided throughout my self-help oriented books: https://brighterdayslifecoaching.com/published-books-and-life-coaching-services/ 

#selfimprovement #selfhelp #selfdevelopment #intention #fulfillment #success #inspiration #happiness

Live With a Sense of Adventure, Passion, and Excitement

Posted on by Joseph M. Brennan Jr.

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One way to live a happier life is to live with a sense of adventure, passion, and excitement. You can do this by exploring a wide range of interests and new experiences, ensuring you always have something to look forward to, and by allowing things to unfold however they might without any preconceived notions or expectations. Life can be such a thrill if you seek to live in this fashion at least on a periodic basis.

One thing I did recently in this regard was taking a road trip in a Mustang convertible that I rented. And I must admit there is something both free and exhilarating about saying “Let’s put the top down and cruise the open road… GO!”

experienced several wonderful places on this road trip: Savannah, Hilton Head, Georgetown SC, Myrtle Beach, Raleigh, Charleston, and Jacksonville FL. Charleston was probably my favorite out of all of these. I consider Charleston to be the king of charm! Of the 62 places I’ve traveled to and spent a significant amount of quality time in it ranks up at #3 – tied with Guadalajara Mexico, Buenos Aires Argentina, Boston/New England Areas, San Diego California, and Los Angeles California.

Taking a road trip like this in a convertible was something I’ve wanted to do for years now and I finally did it. This demonstrates three things that I frequently tell people for living a happier life: 1) Live with a sense of adventure, passion, and excitement, 2) Reward yourself all along the way towards your goals and dreams, and 3) Always have something to look forward to.
It’s amazing how wonderful it feels just to cruise the open road with the wind blowing all around you. It can greatly inspire you, make you feel alive, give you time for reflection and relaxation, and fill you with overpowering feelings of joy, excitement, and freedom.

So always find ways to incorporate a sense of adventure, passion, and excitement into your life. It can really ignite, reinvigorate, and electrify your life. You will feel like a new person filled with youth, fire, and vigor. So do this for yourself if you can.

This and other happiness and self-improvement related tips are provided throughout my self-help oriented books: https://brighterdayslifecoaching.com/published-books-and-life-coaching-services/ 

#selfimprovement #selfhelp #selfdevelopment #intention #fulfillment #success #inspiration #happiness